Cuty and Pycho 🥰🤪

Heyaa! This time I'd like to talk about probably biggest fear that I have, probably a weird one and most likely not understandable by most of the people, and like the title of this post says, it's a fear of not being a trans. So let me get into this. To begin with, I will say that I'm into questioning and exploring my gender already for like a decade, in other words - ever since I found out about transgender-ism and found community of people feeling similarly, and that's when I started to suspect that I'm a trans, but after some time I discovered that it might be just a fetish, so I started to suspect that, but at the end I decided that it's not just a fetish. Sooo, why did I suspect it's just a fetish ? Briefly saying it's because all the time after I got to an orgasm, all the feeling and desire to be a girl used to go away, and feeling of shame with thoughts of "what the hell am I doing" would kick in, so that's used to be a main reason f...

I really love make-up, but I really hate when I need to clean it off for when I have to get back to my boymode...  Even tho I have stopped my HrT, all the time that I'm able to spend in girlmode , I do spend so, and as my job is really masculine one and I really have to be in my boymode while at work, so sometimes happens that I get to cleaning off my make-up only like an hour until I have to go to work.  Personally when I look at the mirror to see if I did clean it good, I think that I cleant it good, but then when at work some guys does notice leftovers of makeup, particularly make-up of eyes... and this already happened more time then I would like as when it happens I really start to overthink a lot about it... Well, I've been able to learn to do make-up, guess I should be able to learn to clean it of properly, shouldn't I ?

Well… there are some people who know about that, but it wasn’t so that I told about it myself, and guess I could say that I never planned to come out to neither my friends, neither my family since I know what their reaction/response would be… Anyway, a couple of my friends, which I was counting as family, found out about my feminine side, and their reaction to it pretty much was just as I thought it would be, and briefly saying, we are not friends anymore and stopped being in touch with each other. Obviously, it made me feel pretty sad about that, but on the other side, this allowed me to feel and more freely about being a girl since I don’t have to switch between ‘boymode’ and 'girlmode’ so often and can live in 'girlmode’ most of my time, so at least some pros from it. To continue with, I must say that I really started to have thoughts about coming out to my family, Im really not sure what made me have these, but if I’d need to give at least one reason why, I’d say it’s becau...

Hey there! You just wandered into my journal of my trans journey 🏳️‍⚧️ My name is Eve, and I’m not a casual girl… 🤭😏 As a matter of fact, I’m on the journey of discovering myself as girl, and this is really fun, exciting, maybe a bit awkward or weird, but at the end of the day I’m happy about it 💃 I’ve always enjoyed writing and idea of writing journal/blog always seemed fun and attracting ✍, so I’m really hyped about sharing it with you! 😜